Love Talks
Introduce
Some thoughts on love. Despite feeling drowsy, I am forcing myself to write this essay on love with a clear mind. Perhaps it is to console myself after the disappointment of a past relationship. Sleepiness may weigh down my body, but memories torment my heart. Teacher Luo's interpretation and advice on love are words of wisdom. Now, let me share my own views on love.
The definition of love will constantly evolve with the times.
Each era's love is influenced by environmental factors, so many past cases of love cannot provide direct experience for today. We can see that the tear-jerking mythical love stories passed down through generations, such as "The Cowherd and Weaver Girl" and "The Seven Fairies and Dong Yong," all have distinct characteristics of their time. The small agricultural economy where men farmed and women wove could support the continuation of civilization. Perhaps marriage relationships were more utilitarian in terms of survival at that time, as people needed a partner to maintain sustainable productivity. Marriage brought about cooperative production relations which provided more development space than individual survival alone, while also catering to social opinion. We still face supervision from parents, relatives, friends and other social relationships: why aren't you getting married? I can say with certainty that even in ancient times or modern society today, most people value marriage as cooperation to cope with greater survival pressure and seek more living space. Marriage does not necessarily equate to concrete love; it is more like a strong bond contract that tightly binds two lives together. Of course motivation and results are not necessarily symmetrical; strong bonds do not necessarily bring bad results either. The older generation around me who talked about their post-marriage life mostly did not have many romantic plots but rather mundane matters such as food supplies or household chores - they completed coexistence within these trivialities. I thought this was a very painful process but after listening later on, you would hear harmony in their frankness; trust built within this contract was surprisingly stronger than blood relationship kinship - I didn't hear blame but instead saw responsibility. This is what Professor Luo expressed as 'love is an emotion guided by responsibility.' I truly felt their sincerity towards life; seeing the greatest romance from those who never pursued it.
The modernization of love has been romanticized.
I always mention a word, "romantic". What is romance? In the English explanation, it is "A feeling of excitement and mystery associated with love" or "A strong emotional and physical attraction towards someone". You can see that romance is a feeling and emotion, it is an emotional sensation. It should be understood that emotions are unsustainable and continuously declining. When you first see a cute toy, you may not want to let go of it. But after ten times, one hundred times, one thousand times or even ten thousand times later, will you still treasure it as much? Therefore in today's post-modern society where social productivity has greatly improved and production relations are undergoing unprecedented changes, we no longer need another person to seek more development space; we increasingly emphasize the realization of personal value. In terms of social relationships management strategies have slowly shifted from cooperation to screening. The romanticization of love is an example of social transformation. People are becoming more demanding about love and often regard it as an emotional experience beyond materialism and rationality but contrary to society, economy and politics. Why do people become increasingly demanding about their expectations for love?
Love has become an organ of society.
Karl Marx once said: the economic base determines the superstructure. Under the development of post-modern society, the liberation of productivity promotes people's pursuit of spirituality. The relationship between men and women is no longer based on factors such as family interests and social status, but rather on whether their inner emotional needs are met. At the same time, the redistribution of rights and responsibilities between men and women is also a factor that drives changes in love. In traditional concepts, men are expected to provide economic value while women are expected to take care of household chores and children. However, this gender-based division of labor is becoming increasingly outdated with social progress. Before a new type of cooperation between men and women can be formed, its development prospects remain unclear; however it will undoubtedly subvert traditional marriage concepts. Regardless of social systems, personal emotions or gender roles perspectives, post-modern society advocates for diversified development in love relationships - it is precisely this diversification that endows love with social rights so as to regulate social conflicts and promote solidarity. Therefore, people do not necessarily demand more from love; instead forms of love are undergoing change. We all experience this baptism firsthand with increasing options before us - if we only limit ourselves to old-fashioned ideas when criticizing "degraded" love then we may risk being overwhelmed by this diverse era without realizing what kind(s)of loves we truly want or how best to stay true to our hearts.
Love dispels illusions.
I seem to have a bit of a taste for romantic love. On the contrary, what I want to express is to stop idealizing love. In the current social context, love can be commercialized and become a means of satisfying consumer demand. We can see overwhelming holiday marketing about Valentine's Day, shopping festivals, and even the most successful De Beers diamond marketing slogan "A Diamond Is Forever". Love has become more complicated. Do not give love any unrealistic marginal meaning, otherwise we will always see mirages on the surface.